|Meghan and me in 2009 - photo by Danuta Zgurzynski|
My name is Adam Warner, and I took over writing this blog in April 2010, when my wife, Meghan Baker, passed away from breast cancer. Meghan had been writing here since she was first diagnosed in 2008.
Meghan and I met in 2007 teaching English in Seoul, South Korea, where we quickly fell in love. After her diagnosis in October 2008, we moved back to our respective homes; hers in Petrolia, Ontario and mine in Washington, DC. She underwent a mastectomy, chemotherapy and then radiation, throughout which I would travel up to Ontario as often as possible to see her. In the summer of 2009, just before she finished her final radiation, I decided to move to Detroit, Michigan to be as close as to her as possible.
While the treatments tired her out, Meghan spent a lot of energy trying to move forward with her life. As long as I knew Meghan she was a list maker. She constantly revised and revamped her list of goals to accomplish in her life. She knew she wanted to go back to school to become a nurse because that profession would allow her to help people on a daily basis.
By December of 2009, Meghan was enrolled in a nursing pre-req program, volunteering in the radiation department of a local hospital and working part time at a clothing store. That’s a very, very, very small portion of the goals she was rapidly checking off. Meghan was unstoppable.
In January of 2010, Meghan was re-diagnosed with brain metastasis, which are incurable. By February, the cancer had spread to her hips, liver, lungs, lymph nodes and shoulder. Meghan never gave up hope. She continued to knock off goals. She went to a city she’d wanted to revisit since childhood, she went to the symphony, she continued to read books and learn. We were married on March 28th of 2010, in a beautifully intimate ceremony at her home, with only immediate family present. Meghan continued to plan for the future and for me. She pushed me constantly to do things I hadn’t yet, to make something of myself. Meghan passed away on April 27th, 2010, a week to the day of my birthday and one day short of our month anniversary.
Because of Meghan and for Meghan I am finishing her list of goals. The big and long list. Meghan was completely selfless and always wanted to help. The sole purpose of her blog was to have a very detailed and honest account of cancer treatment. She wanted people in similar situations to be able to find the help, information and inspiration they needed to carry on.
I want everyone to be sure that my underlying purpose through all of this is to complete what Meghan couldn’t and to do so with her spirit of giving. Her blog kept a detailed description of the physical and emotional struggles that come with living a life with cancer. We started a Facebook page to allow friends and family, along with anyone else who she might have inspired, to follow her along this journey. My hope is to tell her story and spread her message of love and inspiration; to live life to its fullest, helping yourself by helping those around you.